Demelza Poldark (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
letitbetrue) wrote2016-05-05 02:17 pm
letitbetrue) wrote2016-05-05 02:17 pm
(june)
Were she willing to admit to such things, Demelza would have to acknowledge she's just the slightest bit nervous about having Baz over.
It isn't that she doesn't trust Baz or that she thinks he might judge her, but that she wants terribly to please him. He's been so kind to her right from the start and she's come to carry quite the affection for him, thinking of him almost as she'd thought of Jinny, someone to care for, someone who perhaps might be taken under her wing. It's that strange to think of anyone in such a manner, especially when there's so much for her to learn herself, but if there's one thing Demelza knows, it's her own mind, and she knows what she feels.
She's a mother, after all, soon to be a mother of two, and she can feel when people are in need of someone like her. Jinny had wanted for a little guidance, especially after Jim's arrest and his awful, preventable death, and Demelza hadn't thought herself fit to give it, but perhaps she'd been wrong. Perhaps there are those who might take to her simply because her feelings are so free, so unconstrained.
Whatever it is, she's invited Baz over to repay him for all he's done. She's preparing a lunch and Julia is content on the floor beside Demelza, sitting comfortably and chewing on some of her toys. There are still come teeth coming in and Demelza ducks down to check on her daughter every so often, though her growing belly has begun to make that difficult, and she kisses Julia's soft hair gently.
"Soon you shall meet Baz," she says to her daughter. "He's very sweet and I think you shall love him."
It isn't that she doesn't trust Baz or that she thinks he might judge her, but that she wants terribly to please him. He's been so kind to her right from the start and she's come to carry quite the affection for him, thinking of him almost as she'd thought of Jinny, someone to care for, someone who perhaps might be taken under her wing. It's that strange to think of anyone in such a manner, especially when there's so much for her to learn herself, but if there's one thing Demelza knows, it's her own mind, and she knows what she feels.
She's a mother, after all, soon to be a mother of two, and she can feel when people are in need of someone like her. Jinny had wanted for a little guidance, especially after Jim's arrest and his awful, preventable death, and Demelza hadn't thought herself fit to give it, but perhaps she'd been wrong. Perhaps there are those who might take to her simply because her feelings are so free, so unconstrained.
Whatever it is, she's invited Baz over to repay him for all he's done. She's preparing a lunch and Julia is content on the floor beside Demelza, sitting comfortably and chewing on some of her toys. There are still come teeth coming in and Demelza ducks down to check on her daughter every so often, though her growing belly has begun to make that difficult, and she kisses Julia's soft hair gently.
"Soon you shall meet Baz," she says to her daughter. "He's very sweet and I think you shall love him."
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"This is amazing. I'm completely starved!"
[ooc: omg I'm sorry I lost this notif for sixty years]
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"This is the closest I've seen to a proper English meal in awhile," I tell Demelza with a smile, though it's strained. I know I have to tell her. It will be more awkward eating behind a napkin the whole time.
"So, you know my, ah, affliction?" I start, because at least she saw what I am back at New Years. Snakes, this is embarrassing. "I can't eat without my fangs being out. Just to warn you."
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"Oh," she says, looking at Baz as she cuts into one of the pies. "Oh, Baz, I'm that sorry, I never thought... can 'ee eat all this?" He seems to have implied he can, but she just doesn't know enough and hasn't thought to ask. "Is there something better I should have brought for you?"
Simon looks happy and she's still terribly pleased by that, but she's embarrassed that she may be serving things Baz might not want.
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"I can lean forward," I offer, quite aware of the many years I spent trying to make Baz's fangs come out. Now I want to protect them. "Block you a bit so Julia can't see."
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Julia seems mostly enthralled with her food, and at her age I'm not sure she'd even know to be scared with the fangs anyway. I squeeze Simon's leg under the table, appreciative of the suggestion. "I think Julia will be alright. If she gets scared that might be a good idea, though," I admit, hoping it doesn't come to that. I don't want to frighten Demelza's daughter and ruin the whole thing.
But I might as well get it over with, so I eat a spoonful of potato and feel the familiar pressure as my fangs pop, extending just past my lower lip.
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She remembers what it was like. The whispers, the glances from the side of Ruth Teague's eye and then the giggles she and her mother and sisters would share. She remembers the words. Not as lovely as Elizabeth, but I expect she'll clean up nice enough. As if she hadn't already spent hours trying to tame her hair and clean her skin and make certain she was on her best behaviour. No, she would never be as lovely as Elizabeth, but the words hadn't needed to be said.
"Besides, I think you look rather handsome with them out," she declares. Julia is far more interested in the food than anyone else, but when she does look up, she tries to offer Baz a handful of squished peas that Demelza immediately collects and puts back on her tray. "Doesn't he look handsome?" she asks Simon, certain he'll agree.